Kakashi and the Packing Tape
by Kuro
Summary: [Complete!] Tsunade has taken Kakashi's Icha Icha Paradise and left him with a roll of packing tape! Whats our poor bored Kakashi going to do?
1. The Idea to make Kakashi act like Dr Sue

  
  
^__^ HA! Just like I promised, Kakashi and The Packing Tape! ^-^ So, my Valentines gift to you, is my story, since its Valentines day!   
  
Oh, by the by, I'm glad people enjoyed Evil Maniacal Laughter ^^;;; Right, anyways...   
  
~*_*~   
  
**Kakashi and the Packing Tape:  
Chapter One: The Idea to make Kakashi act like Dr. Suess.**   
  
~&_&~   
  
Kakashi sat with a bored expression... erm... as if he doesn't always have one, but... whatever. The only thing he had was a roll of packing tape to amuse himself with. That evil Hokage had taken his Icha Icha Paradisu book set (Evil Tsunade-sama!) and gave him packing tape. Why packing tape you might ask? This is a simple question with a fairly simple answer; she was drunk and ran out of duct tape. So here Kakashi sat, glaring at the roll of packing tape with nothing to read, or do. Naruto, Sasuke and Sakura were off... somewhere doing... something. He seriously didn't know. Nor did he want to sometimes. Other times he wondered if he should start stalking them... A light bulb went off in Kakashi's head. He had an idea. Now Kakashi having an idea was never a good thing. Yondaime-sama often told him so. Let's have a small flash back before we continue the story...   
  
**~The AMAZING Flash back of DOOM!~**   
  
Chibi Kakashi sat with his team while Yondaime-sensei explained some random thing. He didn't know. He wasn't paying attention. Why should a _genius_ pay attention?!?! It was preposterous!!   
  
"Anyways," Yondaime said. "So... since we're basically done; do you guys have any idea of what you want to do?" A light bulb went off in Kakashi's head.   
  
"I KNOW WHAT WE COULD DO!!" Kakashi yelled jumping up and scaring the boy beside him.   
  
"Anybody but you Kakashi-kun. Sorry; but you and ideas don't go well together," Yondaime sweat dropped and Kakashi hung his head and walked back to sit with his team.   
  
"Thank you sensei," mouthed the only girl on the team.   
  
**~Sadly, the end of the amazing flash back of doom~**   
  
Kakashi, his idea written down in his head, ran out the window with the packing tape. Oh joy. What have you inflicted on the world Tsunade-sama?!?!   
  
~A quick slip over to Tsunade before going back to Kakashi~   
  
Tsunade sneezed and blinked. Damn, she had a hell of a hang-over, and sneezing damn well hurt.   
  
"Stupid... thing... inside head... brain! That was it... why'd you have to make me go and sneeze?" Tsunade scowled.   
  
"Um... Hokage-sama? I don't mean to interrupt your brain scowling but..." Kotetsu sweat dropped. "Actually, never mind."   
  
"GOOD! I still need to scowl at my brain. It'll take at least 10 minutes," Tsunade stated.   
  
"Oh~kay then..." Kotetsu ran out of the room as fast as possible.   
  
~Back to Kakashi! Oh what fun~   
  
Kakashi ran wildly through the streets with the roll of packing tape. Iruka watched the crazed teacher run by.   
  
"KAKASHI-SEMPAI!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!?" Iruka asked. Kakashi skipped to a halt then ran backwards to talk to Iruka.   
  
"Sorry Iruka-kun! I have an idea! With a light bulb and everything, and I need to be fast and I need to be swift. And I need to use this packing tape. I have no time to talk!" with that Kakashi was off again.   
  
"Was he trying to be Dr. Seuss again?" Iruka sighed and continued his way to the academy. Kakashi on the other hand had begun to run on his hands figuring it was faster. He soon found it wasn't so he ran like a dog, but no, he was still slower. So he kept running on his feet.   
  
~*~*~   
  
"Oi, Gai-sensei," Neji said looking out the window, "Isn't that Kakashi-sensei?" Gai and his team looked out the window.   
  
"So it is!" roared Gai. "I wonder what he's doing..."   
  
"Want ME to find out Gai-sensei?!?" Lee asked. Gai thought for a few moments.   
  
"Gai-sensei...? Did you fall asleep?" TenTen asked innocently.   
  
"NANI?!? The **amazing** Gai never falls asleep while making decisions!" Gai said angrily waving a fist at TenTen, who sweat dropped.   
  
"Right, gomen Gai-sensei..." TenTen said sweat dropping.   
  
"No. It's okay Lee! I shall find out later!" Gai said finally.   
  
"Alright sensei!" Lee said happily and continued eating his lunch. Neji and TenTen glanced at each other and shrugged.   
  
"Weirder things have happened, just remember that Neji," TenTen whispered to the white-eyed boy. Neji nodded.   
  
"Yes, but that doesn't explain why we're stuck with them," Neji blinked. TenTen and Neji sighed in unison. They some how knew that they were going to be involved in some hair-brain scheme to bug Kakashi.   
  
~*~*~   
  
"Naruto!" Sakura waved her hand in front of the blond teens face. "WAKE UP YOU LAZY ASS!"   
  
"I'M NOT A LAZY ASS!! That's _so_ Shikamaru's job! PLUS its lazy idiot," Naruto stated.   
  
"Whatever... where'd Sasuke-kun go?" Sakura asked suddenly.   
  
"To eat cheese, where else?" Naruto snorted, as if this was the most obvious thing in the world.   
  
"... Naruto, Sasuke-kun is allergic to cheese," Sakura sweat dropped.   
  
"REALLY?!" Naruto gaped.   
  
"Yes actually—AH!!" Sakura ducked as Kakashi jumped over Naruto and Sakura's heads. "What the...?"   
  
"KAKASHI-SENSEI WHERE ARE YOU GOING?!?" Naruto yelled, flailing arms and all. Kakashi backtracked and sat on Naruto's head. "Okay, get the hell off my head, now, you jerk." Kakashi breathed calmly, stepped off Naruto's head, and looked very solemnly at Sakura and Naruto.   
  
"That bitch Tsunade-sama took my Icha Icha Paradise books and gave my PACKING TAPE!! I have AN IDEA and must go and make this idea REAL!" with that Kakashi continued to run into the distance.   
  
"OH~KAY!" Sakura edged away from... where Kakashi was.   
  
"Indeed Sakura," Naruto said.   
  
"I'm... going away now..."   
  
"Alrighty then!" Naruto waved to Sakura as she ran off in the opposite direction.   
  
~^_^~   
  
**A Side Note**   
  
I don't think I used any Japanese that's irregular for my fics so... ANYWAYS! YES! This is the first (and short) chapter of _'Kakashi and The Packing Tape'_. Why yes children! You should be afraid! ^_^ Sakura, Naruto and Sasuke wont be in this much, but you can expect Gai, and many, many flash backs to occur. Maybe even Jiraiya will pop in! ^_~ Right, my promise has been fulfilled!   
  



	2. The Runin caused by a Bribe with Chocola...

  
**Disclaimer:** I think you know what I'm going to say...   
  
~&_&~   
  
**Chapter two: The run-in caused by a bribe with chocolate**   
  
~%_%~   
  
After a few moments, Kakashi realized suddenly that 4 pairs of eyes were watching him. He stopped and sighed.   
  
"WHY MUST EVERYONE STOP ME IN MY IDEA-QUEST?!" Kakashi sobbed... and he sobbed... and he cried... and he... well, you get the point. Suddenly, Gai and Lee popped out of... well... only GOD knows where.   
  
"Well if it isn't... hey... NEJI!! TENTEN!" Gai tapped his foot impatiently. Sighing, Neji and TenTen came out of no where sweat dropped.   
  
"_Why the hell are we here again?_" Neji asked TenTen in a whisper.   
  
"_Gai said something about giving us chocolate, if we came along... I'm beginning to hate myself for chocolate addiction..._" TenTen replied.   
  
"_I totally agree with that statement,_" Neji whispered back.   
  
"**Ahem!** Are you two quite done?" Gai asked.   
  
"Hai Gai-sensei," Neji and TenTen said sadly.   
  
"Alright! So... where was I...? Oh yes, well! If it isn't my eternal rival!" Gai said "majestically."   
  
"Oh, it's only you Gai... leave me the hell alone will you? I have important stuff you know?" Kakashi said.   
  
"Like what _kind_ of important stuff?" Gai asked suspiciously.   
  
"Like um... stuff..." Kakashi said shiftily.   
  
"Like...?"   
  
"Like..."   
  
"Yes?"   
  
"Umm... nothing..." Kakashi twitched. If Gai found out what he was doing, he'd so be in trouble. When it came to stopping Kakashi and his ideas, Obito, that girl he was on a team with... whatever her name was, Yondaime and Gai so would kill him. Simultaneously too! Lets see an example of this.   
  
**~Example of when Kakashi had an idea at age 8~**   
  
"Hey! I know what we should do!" Kakashi shouted.   
  
"Oh no Kakashi," the girl said.   
  
"Yeah, the last time you said that, we were almost KILLED!" Obito yelled.   
  
"KAKASHI HAD AN IDEA?!?" Gai screamed as he ran in. "WE MUST SMOTHER IT!"   
  
"Um... yes we should Gai, but what the hell are you doing here?" Yondaime blinked. "What are you guys doing here? I have work to do... YOU GUYS ARE CHUUNIN!! GO GET A LIFE OR SOMETHING!"   
  
"We need you to help us smother Kakashi's idea," Obito said. And so the four smothered Kakashi with 50 pillows, and therefore smothered his idea.   
  
**~End of the Example~**   
  
"Kakashi, I know your hiding something," Gai said sternly.   
  
"Um... well... I uhh... needed to see..." Kakashi thought quickly. What in Ra's name was he to do?   
  
"Who are you going to see Kakashi?" Gai asked.   
  
"Actually..." an evil smirk crossed Kakashi's masked face. "I need your help with something Gai!"   
  
"MY help!? Who's to say I'll help?" Gai asked.   
  
"I did," Kakashi said proudly.   
  
"I see, what are you planning?" Gai questioned.   
  
"I never plan Gai! That's what makes me so amazing! Anyways, I need your help... choosing a present for our _lovely_ Hokage!" Kakashi smiled.   
  
"Oh! We'll help then!" Gai clapped. He pointed towards the village. "Follow me!" Gai led them marching towards the village's main market place... thing... Lee followed, walking exactly like Gai, while TenTen and Neji sweat dropped and followed. Kakashi followed behind them.   
  
"_Psst,_" Kakashi whispered. TenTen and Neji gave him a weird look. "Would you two like to help me to get revenge on Tsunade later?" he asked. TenTen and Neji looked at each other.   
  
"Why are you taking revenge?" Neji asked.   
  
"She took something from me, and gave me PACKING TAPE!" Kakashi said in a strained voice.   
  
"We'll help then; it'll so make Gai-sensei mad!" TenTen said evilly.   
  
"I completely agree with TenTen, we'll meet you outside the Academy at around 11 tonight," Neji nodded.   
  
"Excellent," Kakashi grinned especially evilly. Oh boy was he EVER going to have fun!   
  
~^__^~   
  
Oh dear, whats our lovely Kakashi-sensei planning? Is he so angered he needs TenTen and Neji's help? What is he going to do to the present to Tsunade? Oh deary me, what a predicament!   
  
ANYWAYS! Hope you liked this chapter ^_~   
  



	3. Kakashi's at a Loss for Time

^_^ I feel that the reviewers need to be considered at this time. *bows* you have not only made me feel better, I think I'm _actually_ started to get over this cold because of all you readers and my friends.   
  
**Dark Nemesis 7** - *bows* Why thank you! ^___^ *glomp attack* Thank you for all the reviews!! >=D You rock!  
**Sequ3stered** - o_o But if you throw your evil minions on me... how can I write the fic neh? But... you won't have to >: D I'm updating! MUA HAHAHAHA!!  
**purrfectly976** - ^__^ Thank you!!   
  
And now... on with the fic you so desire to read ^__^   
  
~&_&~   
  
**Kakashi's at a loss for time**   
  
~!_!~   
  
After Kakashi, Neji and TenTen had been dragged through 10,000 different stores, Gai eventually gave Kakashi a little tanuki doll to give to Tsunade.   
  
"Have fun!" Gai had told him as he dragged Neji, TenTen and Lee away. Kakashi sighed and went home. He had to admit, the thing was cute, but it was a valuable part to his plan! The master plan! And Neji and TenTen were to help him with the next part of his plan! It was brilliant! Brilliant I say! Umm... right, anyways. Kakashi wandered around the village aimlessly... wasn't he going home? Anyways... Kakashi wandered around the village aimlessly. Good god, he needed something to do... his revenge on Tsunade wouldn't start until 11 tonight... which was... Kakashi looked around for a clock, not seeing one, he went around asking villagers.   
  
"Excuse me," Kakashi asked a little girl. "Do you have the time?" The little girl blinked.   
  
"My okasan said I should never give the time to strangers," she stated. Kakashi blinked.   
  
"Are you serious?! Wow, my mother just told not to talk to them... well, that's weird," Kakashi took on a thoughtful expression.   
  
"Well, times change mister... hey!" She said suddenly. "You're Hatake Kakashi!"   
  
"Ha! So I'm NOT a stranger!" Kakashi said triumphantly.   
  
"Doesn't matter anyways, I don't have the time," she shrugged and skipped away. Kakashi sweat dropped.   
  
"I wonder about some children sometimes," he told himself.   
  
"That's beautiful Mister Kakashi sir, but... your scaring away my customers, so if you don't mind..." a random shop keeper said.   
  
"Hey! It's the book store! You have the time right? Do you have the next issue of Icha Icha Paradise?!?" Kakashi demanded.   
  
"It won't come in for two weeks," the shop keeper sweat dropped.   
  
"What... the time?"   
  
"No! The book!"   
  
"Oh..."   
  
"Besides, Tsunade-sama said not to sell it to you," the book keeper stated.   
  
"That's so unfair! Now I must killy her!" Kakashi laughed maniacally.   
  
"Not near my store!" The book keeper took out a random giant mallet of **DOOM!** And sent Kakashi flying all chibi-like and, any villager who knew Kakashi when he was younger, squealed with delight at the sight of the chibi Kakashi. Kakashi merely hoped he wasn't sent back in time to when evil little girls would stalk him... unlike the girl that was on his team, who will now be known as Mumei, because she is after all, anonymous.   
  
"I hate these people," Kakashi stated loudly as he landed very umm... ungracefully in front of that place... with the ramen... uh—oh well, it doesn't matter.   
  
"Hey Kakashi-sensei!" Naruto cried from inside the store. Kakashi turned to him.   
  
"Oh... its you FOX-BOY!! Dun nunanuna FOX-BOY!" Kakashi started singing to the batman theme.   
  
"Iruka-sensei... Kakashi's gone crazy again..." Naruto whispered to dolphin-man.   
  
"And his side-kick, DOLPHIN-MAN!!" Kakashi started singing again. People walked by, whispering behind their hands in a gossipy manner. "Or maybe Fox-boy is Dolphin-man's sidekick... who cares?"   
  
"I certainly don't..." Iruka sweat dropped.   
  
"Do either of you have the time?" Kakashi asked.   
  
"We have loads of time," Naruto said.   
  
"No... The time of day."   
  
"It's the afternoon," Iruka stated. "Can't you see the sun?"   
  
"No, actually I can't. I like being able to see thanks," Kakashi stated calmly.   
  
"I see, well, if you could see the sun, you'd know. Now I must go off and do... teacher-y stuff, and Naruto must do student-y stuff," Iruka stated. "See ya!"   
  
"Bye!" Naruto waved. And the two were gone. Kakashi sighed and wandered some more. There had to be someone with the time. He saw a random girl munching away on a croissant.   
  
"Hey you!" Kakashi called. The girl turned and looked at him lazily, a look that Shikamaru would be proud of.   
  
"What the hell do you want?" she asked with a yawn.   
  
"The time, what time is it?" he asked.   
  
"Dude, sorry, I'm here to wander around, eat croissants and draw. Not give people the time, do I look like someone who would carry a watch?" she rolled her eyes. "Yeesh, go and get a bloody life." She walked away muttering about "bothersome people."   
  
"Oh god! Not a female Shikamaru! AH! HE'S GOING TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD!! AHH!!!" Kakashi ran around like a chicken without its head, flailing his arms around and screaming.   
  
A somewhere in the forest, during an ambush training lesson, Shikamaru sneezed.   
  
"God Shikamaru, what have I told you about SNEEZING during training?!?" Ino fumed.   
  
"Actually, nothing, I don't sneeze usually," Shikamaru drawled.   
  
"Somebody's talking about you," Chyouji whispered in a paranoid voice. The two others shrunk back. In unison, they looked around with shifty eyes.   
  
And so, moving back into the village, away form our shifty eyed friends, we shall watch with great mirth as many more villagers either become attacked by Kakashi for their time, or attack Kakashi for his Sharigan!   
  
"Why wont somebody tell me what time it is?!" he cried, sniffling cutely.   
  
"Aww! Isn't he cute momma?!?" A little girl asked glomping onto Kakashi arm. "Can we keep him momma?!?"   
  
"No dear, you know we're not supposed to bring hobo's home. Remember what happened last time?" her mother asked sternly.   
  
"That was brother's fault! I'm sure he wouldn't have committed suicide by jumping off the chair if brother hadn't played dress up with him. I won't let it happen again!" the little girl whined.   
  
"Do you have the time?" Kakashi asked.   
  
"Actually, we don't have time sir, we need to get her brother from therapy," the women said, grabbing the girl and walking off. This caused Kakashi the burst into tears. He had now spent at least three hours asking for the time, and yet he still hadn't found out what time it was. It was useless though.   
  
"Do you really hate me that much Murphy? After all the fun we had together?! Me making life horrible for people, and you making it worse? Don't you love me anymore Murphy*? WHERE'S THE LOVE?!?" Kakashi screamed.   
  
"If you wanna know that bad, it's a long time before 11, so SHUT YER YAP!" a random villager yelled.   
  
"Oh... thanks mister!" Kakashi smiled and began walking away... that's when it hit. "Hey... how'd you know that I was waiting for 11?" Kakashi looked angrily at the...   
  
.... Spot where the villager was.   
  
"I hate it when they do that..." Kakashi sighed and continued to skip down the street like a merry old soul. That's when...   
  
... **Boredom struck again!**   
  
"Oh dear, what am I to do? I a mere bored little Kakashi, in this great wide interesting world, what is one little bored Kakashi to do while waiting for 11 p.m. to start poor little Kakashi's evil little plot with the help of the evil little Neji and the evil little TenTen. I know! Poor little bored Kakashi can tape his clothing to himself! Like a dumb little bored Kakashi!" Kakashi said to himself, talking in third person. And that he did. Using the **PACKING TAPE OF DOOM™** he taped the top of his pants to his skin, his shirt to his pants, his vest to his pants and shirt, the top of the vest to his neck, and the hem of his pants to his ankles. Not to mention his cuffs to his wrist.   
  
"That's going to hurt when you take it off you know," a female voice said. Kakashi turned and gasped.   
  
"No!" Kakashi said.   
  
Oh yes...   
  
"No, it seriously can't."   
  
How so?   
  
"Well, you see, it's against the laws of gravity, and physiology."   
  
Those have both been broken before, so tough luck kiddo.   
  
"Oh well... continue then," Kakashi nodded.   
  
"Its _your_ line," the female voice said.   
  
"Oh right... _Gasp!_ No! It can't be! It's..."   
  
~*~*~   
  
^^; The whole Kakashi taping his clothes to himself was inspired by Mae-chan (Yugi-Obsessed) ^__^ Thanks Mae-chan!   
  
***-** Murphey's law is the law that says that "Everything that can can't go wrong, will go wrong. And anything that can't get worse, will." 


	4. Asuma's Girlfriend

Moop~! Its time for another chapter of _Kakashi and the Packing Tape_! ^_^ in this episode, we find out who the mysterious person who "attacked" Kakashi! Oh dear! Who could this person be?!   
  
**Disclaimer:** You know what I'm about to say right?   
  
**Notes to the Lovely Reviewers! ^__^   
  
SESSHOUAMRUS_GIRL:** ^^;; Don't hurt yourself now! ^_^   
**Sequ3stered:** I'm glad it lifts your spirits! *sniffles* Makes me feel so proud!  
**Dark Nemesis 7:** =D I'm glad you want me to continue!  
**purrfectly976:** ^__^ Ah, Sasuke will come in later chapters! O_o But because it wont be in this too much, I'll make up for in another story ^_~   
  
~*~*~   
  
**Kakashi and the Packing Tape:  
Chapter 4: Assuma's Girlfriend. **   
  
~*~*~   
  
_Recap!_   
  
"Oh right... _Gasp!_ No! It can't be! It's..."   
  
~*~*~   
  
"It's Lady Yuna!" Kakashi gasped. The girl ran up to the copy-ninja and picked him up by the front of his shirt.   
  
"Do I _look_ like a bloody Final Fantasy character to you?" she asked in a dangerously quiet voice, making our favourite ninja gulp and shiver in fear. PH34R I say! _Ph34R!!_   
  
"Uh... well... i-i-I juh-just thought since well... the hair! And the funny—I mean FUN colored eyes, and the clothing choice... I just thought you were..." Kakashi began, only to be thrown on the ground and stepped on.   
  
"**IT'S ME KURENAI YOU DOPE-HEADED FRUITCAKE! ARE YOU THAT BONEHEADED?!?!**" Kurenai seethed, literally too. With steam and everything!   
  
"Oh my!" Kakashi gasped. "Those are amazing special effects Kurenai! Man, you really have to show me how to do that." Kakashi said in awe.   
  
"Well, I am the special effects master," Kurenai said proudly. "But **that's not the point!**" Kurenai continued to seethe. Kakashi began to think that she was simply insane, and needed Assuma to come and make her feel better, so using _Sasuke's_ ninja prowess, he summoned Assuma.   
  
"What the hell am I doing here? Wasn't I just over there?" Assuma asked Kakashi, pointing to a few centimeters away from where he was standing.   
  
"Yes you were, but I summoned you here using Sasuke's ninja prowess!" Kakashi said proudly. Assuma nodded.   
  
"I see, so... what do you want?" Assuma asked.   
  
"Make your girlfriend stop seething!" Kakashi whined in a childish manner. Assuma's eyes popped out of his head... it was really gross too; them rolling down the street and all... Kakashi made a disgusted face, to that of a disgusted 3 year-olds face... or the face Calvin makes from Calvin and Hobbes... Anyways, after Assuma had his eyes back in his head he turned back to Kakashi.   
  
"I have a girlfriend? How come I was never informed?" Assuma asked.   
  
"Beats me, but you should have known considering you're the boyfriend," Kakashi pointed out.   
  
"Right... of course," Assuma nodded. "Who is she anyways?"   
  
"Your girlfriend is Kurenai," Kakashi said.   
  
"Really? I thought she was the random other Jounin teacher that our creator always randomly makes me walk with!" Assuma said. "Huh, you learn something new everyday," Assuma said, rather impressed with Kakashi's alleged "smart-ness." Leaving Assuma and Kurenai, Kakashi continued his quest down the street to amuse himself, while still having packing tape taping his clothing to him.   
  
"Kakashi-sensei," a timid voice asked. Kakashi turned to see Hinata.   
  
"God, Team eight is popping up everywhere today. What is it Hyuuga-chan?" Kakashi asked sweetly. Hinata sweat dropped.   
  
"Its _Hinata_ not _Hyuuga_," Hinata stated. "I was just wondering why you taped your clothes to you... are you afraid they're going to fall off? Or somebody's going to try and rape you or something?"   
  
"You know, Kurenai could very well have tried to! But no, I was bored you see. I'm waiting for it to be 11!" Kakashi grinned stupidly.   
  
"Why?" Hinata asked.   
  
"Because that's when project... Mushi begins!" Kakashi said with sparkly eyes. Hinata cocked her head.   
  
"Mushi? Does it have something to do with Shino-kun and his clan?" Hinata asked in confusion.   
  
"_She sure asks a lot of stupid questions_. Why no, of course not," Kakashi said, patting her lightly on the head.   
  
"Oh okay... bye Kakashi-sensei!" Hinata said and ran off. Kakashi blinked. What a weird child. He shook his head.   
  
"She is unimportant and does not deserve the amazing Kakashi's attention! Mua ha, ha, ha, ha.... alright, that's enough evil laughter, on to my house again!" Kakashi dashed off to his house for something that you will find out soon, because well... telling you would so totally suck and ruin the entire point of not telling you!   
  
~*~*~*~*~   
  
^_^ Another evil half-cliffy >=D So, anyways, here's yet another crazy chapter of this insane random story.   
  
On a side note: Mushi means bug ^^;;   
  
**Tune in next time for the next exciting chapter of _Kakashi and the Packing Tape_!!!**


	5. Sealing!

  
  
This space intentionally left blank.   
  
~*~*~*~   
  
**Chapter 5: Sealing!**   
  
~*~*~*~   
  
Kakashi arrived promptly at his house. He would _never_ be late for such an important date as this! I mean, he had to pick up his house and take it on a... Oh wait; it's... um... that something private that Kakashi would kill me if said out loud so uh... forget I said anything! So yeah, Kakashi arrived at his house at 10:15... Notice that? 10: _15_! Not just 10, 10:15! Yeah! Not just these merely... SINGLE DOUBLE DIGIT!! But a DOUBLE DOUBLE DIGIT!! OH~~~! BURN~~!! Uh- forget that, anyways, he arrived at his house at 10:15, which was a surprise considering it was only 7:22 when he was talking to Hinata... I don't even want to know what trouble he got into... wait... yes I do... no... Yes!! Let's see.   
  
**~What Kakashi-ish Trouble Kakashi got into~**   
  
Kakashi stared in wonder at the stove. The stove was a very amazing thing you know. So amazing it was... brilliant! Everyone should have one... except Kakashi. We don't trust him cooking. Anyways, there Kakashi was standing and staring in wonder at the wonderfully amazingly brilliant stove. That's when an idea struck him. Here he had packing tape, he was hungry, there was a pot of boiling water and some noodles... so why not make pasta with packing tape balls?! It was brilliant if he did say so himself. Which he did... anyways, he put some spaghetti into the boiling water and watched it boil, and melt... and melt I say! Yes, so as Kakashi waited oh so patiently for his lovely spaghetti, he began to promptly rip up some tape and create little balls of tape. After making at least 5 he began playing the cupboard game. This consisted of walking around, looking in cupboards for what you want. After the lovely noodles were ready, our lovely little sensei put the noodles and packing tape balls onto the plate he had been looking for and found. As soon as he was about to look for a fork a man, who looked really icky and I wont even go into a description of, walked in.   
  
"Hey~~! You! What are you doing in my kitchen?! Did you use my boiling water?!?! THAT WAS FOR THE RAMEN FOR THAT ANNOYING UZUMAKI KID!! ARG~~!!" the man yelled having a whole little spazz in the door way of the kitchen. Kakashi edged back.   
  
"Umm... yeah... Using Sasuke prowess I shall teleport myself out of the kitchen!" and with that, Kakashi _frolicked_ past the spazzing man   
  
**~End of that~**   
  
Kakashi scurried around his house, like a mouse looking for cheese. Except our Kakashi wasn't looking for cheese! Oh no, he was looking for a box! In this box were many other boxes. And so _special_ paper! No! Not like special brownies! What have you been smoking?! After finding the box, and pulling some stuff out, he began to do something very important...   
  
_Wrap the present Gai had bought._   
  
Now you probably wondering what Kakashi taped it together with... well... since this present was for Tsunade and Tsunade gave him packing tape, I think you can guess. Of course, Kakashi couldn't settle for just a plain looking wrapped-with-packing-tape-and-wrapping-paper present. Oh _no_. This was Hatake Kakashi we're talking about! So, Kakashi made the box look like a cat. Now, he didn't use just one layer of wrapping paper! But _11_! You see that magic? _11_! And 5.5 layers of packing tape. 5.5 You might ask? Well, shut up and go with it. This is Kakashi we're talking about! So after wrapping the present in a collective 16.5 layers, Kakashi frolicked out of his house to the Academy. Faster than a speeding bullet! More powerful than a gorilla! It's... BACKPACK KID!! Uhh—hey! Where'd that come from!?! Anyways, Kakashi scampered, (wasn't he frolicking? Does it matter?), to the ninja academy. Since it was late, Kakashi ran into no one, and nothing happened that was too exciting.   
  
~*~*~   
  
After scampering/frolicking all the way the academy, Kakashi found himself with a few minutes to spare.... well... half an hour. So he sat... and waited... and waited... and waited... and... Well, you get the point. That's when he heard it. At first is was very soft, then it got louder... and louder... and louder!   
  
"_It's the raisons that make! Kellogg's Raison Brand ™ so great!_" sang three people in raison suits. They marched around singing that repeatedly, in circles and sometimes widening it and going forward and moving down the street. "_It's the raisons that make! Kellogg's Raison Brand ™ so great!_" Now, although our Kakashi has done many weird things in the past day or so, he had never seen anything as weird as this. As the people got closer, he saw their faces.   
  
"Konohamaru...?" Kakashi blinked. "Udon? Moegi...? What is going on?" That's when it happened. As the three little children walked in circles and yet moving forward continued to chant Ebisu ran up carrying a huge spoon; about the size of his arm.   
  
"**_SPOON!!!_**" he yelled chasing the little children. They screamed and ran in different directions to hide. Ebisu went after Udon. After a few moments, Konohamaru and Moegi came out and looked around. In small voices they started their chant again. As they went, they become louder and more confident.   
  
"**_SPOON!!_**" Ebisu shouted again. And again, Konohamaru and Moegi ran in random directions to get away from the teacher carrying the spoon. This time, only Konohamaru emerged from his hiding spot. He sniffed sadly and began walking in circles.   
  
"It's the... raisons that make... Kellogg's raison brand so great..." he chanted between sniffs. Slowly, the boy began becoming happier and louder... and damn could his voice go loud! "_It's the raisons that make! Kellogg's Raisons Brand ™ so great!_" he continued to chant happily.   
  
"**_SPOOOONNNN~~!!_**" Ebisu shouted again, running at Konohamaru. Konohamaru shrieked and ran down the street.   
  
"Well... that was the freakiest thing I have _ever_ seen... except for that time Gai and Asuma made a scatter plot graph to take over the world. That is just up there," Kakashi said to himself.   
  
"I have to agree," a random voice said from beside Kakashi. Kakashi yelped and looked. It was...   
  
"Uh, do I know you?" Kakashi asked.   
  
"I'm Kiba... dog-boy?" Kiba said hopefully. Kakashi laughed.   
  
"Oh yeah! That moron!!" Kakashi continued to laugh. "Oh wait... I was supposed to say that in my head wasn't I?"   
  
"Uh... sure," Kiba edged away from Kakashi slightly.   
  
"Hey, dog-boy," Kakashi growled.   
  
"What?"   
  
"Wanna throw packing tape balls at unsuspecting people with me?" Kakashi asked holding out the packing tape.   
  
"Nobody is out now," Kiba scrunched up his nose.   
  
"That's what I thought too, but look at us! And those people down there!" Kakashi pointed wildly.   
  
"Wow... they deserve to have stuff thrown at them if they're out there this late!" Kiba cried. Akamaru barked his agreement. Kakashi grinned happily and made strips of packing tape. And the throwing commenced...   
  
~*~*~   
  
"HAHAHAHA!!" Kiba and Kakashi laughed as another person fell over dramatically after being hit with a small and light packing tape ball.   
  
"This is so much fun Kakashi-dude!" Kiba laughed.   
  
"Yeah! We should do this more often," Kakashi chuckled chucking another ball at an unsuspecting person.   
  
"What the hell are you two doing?! Why wasn't I invited?!" a feminine voice cried. The two turned to see Neji and TenTen.   
  
"Move over, this looks like fun!" Neji stated pushing Kakashi and Kiba over so TenTen and he could sit down.   
  
"Alright! MORE AMMO OVER HERE!" Kiba cheered throwing another one. Unfortunately this wasn't downtown Toronto and people actually went to sleep and they were slowly going home. As the crowds thinned... and the unconscious people woke up, Kiba decided to go home. "We'll have to do this again someday!" he waved and ran home... only to be hit by a packing tape ball.   
  
"Akamaru ate my sock once," TenTen explained. Neji looked at her.   
  
"You don't wear socks TenTen," Neji pointed out.   
  
"That's like asking me to care, so shut up," TenTen said.   
  
"Now... TO THE PLAN!" Kakashi cried, pulling out the present that was in the shape of a cat. "I want to time it so that she has a set amount of time before it explodes, and if she doesn't open it in time, it'll explode."   
  
"That was repetitive and stupid, but we'll do it," TenTen said. "Now, do you still have wrapping paper?" Kakashi nodded. "Then lets get to work... Neji, you have the markers?"   
  
"Yep!" Neji said much like a two year old.   
  
"Okay! You work on the scroll, and I'll work on the exploding part, Kakashi you go seal up all of Tsunade-sama's windows," TenTen directed.   
  
"Why?" Kakashi asked.   
  
"Because I'm PMSing, now GO!" TenTen shouted. Kakashi quivered and ran.   
  
"NO~~!! Don't leave me alone~~!" Neji screamed.   
  
~*~*~   
  
Sasuke sat in front of Tsunade, in her office... or room... whatever that thing is. He was quite frightened, for you see Tsunade was sitting her back too him, laughing maniacally and staring out the window.   
  
"Uh... Hokage-sama...?" Sasuke asked. Tsunade choked and fell off her chair.   
  
"Ah! What are _you_ doing here?!?" the old woman asked.   
  
"Erm... sitting? You asked me to come..." Sasuke reminded her. Tsunade nodded.   
  
"I just wanted to tell you," Tsunade suddenly looked very creepy. You like when a character is trying to scare their siblings by making something up? Yeah, she made that face. Sasuke, being the weirdo he is being younger and less intelligent than she, coward in fear. "_I'm going to eat your children!_" she said in a creepy scratchy voice.   
  
"AH~~!! NO!! NOT MY CHILDREN!!!" Sasuke screamed, and he ran out of the room. Tsunade laughed maniacally again and suddenly held her head in pain.   
  
"Itai! Where'd this hang-over come from?! Oh wait, I was just asleep... was I laughing maniacally in my sleep again? Oh well..."   
  
~_On the other side of the door_~   
  
Sasuke breathed heavily. Tsunade almost ate his children! Then it dawned on our young, stupid user of the legendary ninja prowess that I keep mentioning.   
  
"Wait a sec... I don't have children!" Sasuke looked mad. Then he shrugged. "Meh..." He walked home. Only a few minutes after he left however, Neji, TenTen and Kakashi struck! Who'd be up at 11 p.m? ...11:33 but who cares? Anyways, the three _stealthily_ and _skillfully_... well... stumbled and fell and made a lot of racket actually.   
  
"Gahk! Neji! You're on my hair!!" TenTen twitched.   
  
"No I'm not, I'm over here," Neji sweat dropped.   
  
"Kakashi?" TenTen asked.   
  
"Erm... I'm beside Neji," Kakashi blinked.   
  
"Then... who's on my head...?" TenTen began sweating.   
  
"Sorry young civilian!" said Spiderman.   
  
"Ah! It's Spiderman! My hero!" Kakashi said childishly.   
  
"Beautiful, get off my head," TenTen demanded.   
  
"Uh... sorry," Spiderman said sheepishly, leaping off TenTen's hair.   
  
"Meh," she shrugged.   
  
"I love your theme song!" Kakashi said. Then he proceeded to sing the Batman theme.   
  
"Erm... I'm Spiderman, not Batman," Spiderman sweat dropped.   
  
"Oh right... GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE!!" Kakashi shouted. Spiderman pouted and left. "Now then... shall we finish up here?" Kakashi asked evilly.   
  
"Yes, we shall," Orochimaru said eviler. The trio turned to look at him.   
  
"What the fuck?!" Neji shouted. And boy did he shout.   
  
"Orochimaru! We didn't finish our game of Duel Monsters!" Jiraiya shouted.   
  
"First of all, it's _Go Fish_ and second, I couldn't help myself! I mean, he just sounded so evil," Orochimaru protested.   
  
"Yeah, yeah, always with the excuses, you're almost out of life points!" Jiraiya said happily. Orochimaru sweat dropped.   
  
"Whatever," he sighed. "FCUK perfume smells good!" Orochimaru shouted from down the hall.   
  
"Walking advertisement," TenTen pouted. "No need to rub it in!"   
  
"Lets continue," Neji said uncertainly. So, _stealthily_ as ninjas couldn't do, the trio clattered loudly into Tsunade's room... thing, and delivered the present and scroll.   
  
~*~*~   
  
**Reviewer Response!**   
  
**Kiako Ornitier ~** *twirls* Another happy reader! ^___^  
**NaTTiE ~** ^__^;; Yeah, well... that was the result of too much Final Fantasy.  
**Fireblazie~** ^______^ I'm glad you like the OOC-ness! ^_~ Tis my job to make sure Kakashi acts as stupid as possible!  
**Sakurablossoms333 ~** I will! Unfortunately though, this will be finished in a chapter...  
**SilverKnight7 ~** Mua hahaha! Maybe I'll make you wait! *is pummeled by rabid squirrels* O_o? Okay...   
**KakashiLvr ~** ^___^ YAY! Hee, I love using l33t too. O_o although... it doesn't help with my school work. My teachers seem to give me weird looks...  
**Dark Nemesis ~** Neh, neh! Thank you! ^__^;; I have this problem where I need to add two "S" to everything. Sorry about that!   
  
Anyways, sorry to make you wait so long, but at least the chapter is longer, plus Sasuke makes his appearance. Don't worry, for the lack of Sasuke in this fic I'll make up for in another fic that I've already planned ^__^ Anyways, the disclaimer!   
  
**Discy:** I do not own Naruto, Spiderman, or the raisons thing. I got that from Algonquin xDD Dude, it was so funny! O_o More Algonquin skits will appear later ^^ However, I do own this fic, and the way Kakashi wrapped the gift. (I actually do this, and _used_ to have the Sacred Scroll of (insert noise here) but then when my mom painted my room she threw it out T-T) However, the phrase "I'm going to eat your children" was brought into style by my older sister.   
  
Sadly, for some of this I forgot what I was doing cause I stopped in the middle, sorry about some of the non-making senseness! 


	6. Hawaii, Vodka and Cheese!

*sob* The ending to another humor fic by me!   
  
Disclaimer: Neh, thanks for the help on the ending Anzu-chan >D Neh, you know I don't own Naruto... yet... right? And... yes I do use the scroll O_o;; those are the real rules.   
  
BTB this is not ment to be offensive in anyway, shape or form O_o;;   
  
~*~*~   
  
**Hawaii, vodka, and cheese**   
  
~*~*~   
  
After our favourite fumbling ninja team left out lovely Tsunade's office, said person looked at the scroll and unwrapped it. It was on a piece of wrapping paper written in metallic purple, silver and gold marker. On it read:   
  
_'The sacred scroll of (insert noise here)   
  
1. The person wearing the most jewellery must read the scroll aloud to all present.  
2. Only an unpointy eraser can be used to help open the gift.  
3. If gift receiver is unable to open the gift and obtain the present inside within the time limit (2 minutes) the giver can reobtain the gift. Or the said gift will explode.  
4. No music is to be played while the opening of this gift.  
5. No noise is to be made while the reading and opening of the scroll and gift.  
6. All present must sit in a circle while the present is opened.  
7. No races will be held while the opening of this gift.  
8. Nobody can help the receiver in the opening of the gift.  
9. All rules must be followed.'_   
  
The last rule was small and not legible.   
  
"Meh, who cares?" Tsunade tossed the scroll over her shoulder and began opening the gift. Now this was difficult with the now 20.7 layers of packing tape and wrapping paper. Needless to say, Tsunade did not open her gift with the time limit. After a small, in small meaning super huge, _'boom'_ Shizune ran in... Or would have if the door had not been sealed with packing tape.   
  
"Tsunade-sama!" Shizune yelled from the other side of the door. "Are you okay?! Oh wait... I'm wasting valuable sleeping time and—hey... never mind..." Shizune promptly went back to bed. Gee, these Konoha ninja sure are prompt! Except Kakashi... Speaking of which, out lovely Hokage was screaming his name right now.   
  
"_**KAKASHI~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~!!**_"   
  
~*~*~   
  
Kakashi sneezed.   
  
"Hey, you okay dude?" Neji asked lazily as they walked away from Tsunade's house/office... thing...   
  
"Yeah, just sneezed," Kakashi said equally lazily. In fact, so lazily, Shikamaru would have been proud.   
  
"Dude, that's a seriously offense to my pride, dude," TenTen told the silver haired Jounin whom we all love and drool over.   
  
"Dude, you serious dude?" Kakashi asked.   
  
"Seriously Jounin-dude," TenTen reaffirmed. Kakashi nodded.   
  
"Dude..." They walked in a pregnant pause. How can a pause be pregnant you might ask? Well... that's something you should ask Goku!   
  
"So what do we do now?" Neji asked as they tried to get something at the ramen stand.   
  
"Let's drink vodka!" Kakashi suggested.   
  
"We're not old enough..." TenTen said.   
  
"You are in the state of Hawaii," Kakashi stated.   
  
"No... We're younger there..." Neji told the silver haired Jounin whom this entire universe revolves around.   
  
"Not if I buy the drinks for you," Kakashi clapped childishly. "Please? I love vodka!"   
  
"Well..." TenTen thought. "We do get to go to Hawaii..."   
  
"Do we get cheese?" Neji asked seriously. The two looked at Neji.   
  
"Sure man! You can't go to Hawaii without eating cheese!" Kakashi continued his senseless clapping.   
  
"Seriously Neji dude, where have you been?" TenTen asked critically.   
  
"No where, anyways, lets go!" and the three jumped into the air and turned into a beautiful sketch-y picture.   
  
All in one night. Boy, they certainly can do a lot in one night...   
  
~*~*~*~   
  
xD Okay, I seriously have not a life, but who in this world truly needs one? Anyways, if your sad about this ending, DON'T BE!! ^__^ For to make up for the lack of our favourite fan-dude (Erm... Uchiha) I have created a story specially for him!   
  
**Kuro's Magical Preview of DOOM!**   
  
Uchiha Sasuke: the most _popular_ guy in the school, loved by all girls, and out to kill his brother. He's afraid of nothing and is the number one rookie. _Nobody_ could _ever_ beat _him_!   
  
Until Uzumaki Naruto became his rival.   
  
Although our _fabulous_ Uchiha runt never thought much about Naruto. Who would? Naruto the _outcast_, the _dead last idiot_. Oh the list of things Naruto was could go on forever. Yep, Sasuke was pretty lucky. A rival like him, just made Sasuke look better.   
  
**End**   
  
^^;; I was slightly mad at Sasuke when I wrote this... Hee, so if you want this story, as usual say "I~~~!!! YOU IDIOT OF A POLAR BEAR xD" or... something to that extent ^^;   
  
**Reviewers answered!**   
  
**fireblaze**- ^__^ Yes, you do really gotta love the insane Kakashi!  
**Kiako Ornitier**- xD Indeed! Thats actually and acterate amount of time without cheating xDD  
**Distant Soul**- ^__^ I try my hardest!  
**Dark Nemesis 7**- You are seriously my most lyal reviewer *sniffles* I love you! TT-TT  
**Goddess-of-da-Cheeseburgers**- Mmm... cheeseburgers... oh yeah. I am honoured you would do such a thing madam! ^_____^  
**SilverKnight7**- Thank you~~!! ^_____^  
**huh?**- xD Well, I'm glad to see I excell in messing with peoples heads. Sorry you didn't understand my story~~ ^_^;; 


End file.
